So today should be our first full day of our first real family vacation, instead Connor and I packed for the hospital and Claire is packed up to hang with Grandma and Aunt Meg, sucks only mildly describes it. We are still waiting to see if the airlines will reimburse us, luckily we had no problems with anything else. Tomorrow, Connor and I head into another cycle, an unknown of how he will react. We do not know how long we are checking in for, we don’t know what side effects he will have, we don’t even know what the sleeping arrangements will be (it is dangerous for me to expose myself to chemo through urine so not sure how sleeping will work out). Today has been a rough day, one with me on edge in anticipation of watching my son have poison put in his body, today sucked, tomorrow will be worse because I say goodbye to Claire for a week and hello to devil drug methotrexate. Please let this all work, and be worth it as the NICU was and please, please let my kids be young enough to forget it all.